<meta>I go through this swing every Thursday and sometimes on Saturday: OMFG, so tired. I'm just going to go home and sleep and fuck the blog post. No one'll notice. Ahhh, now I have an idea. Oh shit, I didn't cook anything this week. Well, I'll be up late anyway. Ooh, now I'm looking forward to my fireside chat/captive audience. Man, lemme loose at the keyboard! I have ideas and pictures to share!</meta>
I seem to be in a period of creative contraction. That is, I haven't made anything innovative in a while. This morning I made carrot cake pancakes Ownie Mom-style with a sprinkle of trail mix on top.
Then I mixed up some undead gingerbread to chill because this is what you do for your Goth friends.
My cookbook collection has leveled up since I picked up a copy of The Fannie Farmer Cookbook, 11th ed. at a used bookstore yesterday.
I can tell there will be good deconstruct-and-rebuilds from this. The person who previously owned it left flour on the crepes page!
News and notes:
The Vegetarian Resource Group reported on the veganinity of Starbucks Coffee Company's offerings. Thus ends my chai latte consumption as it is not listed as safe. The sugar effs me up anyway.
VRG also reported on an injectable source of B12 (its presence, not its effectiveness, note). There's still a more humane way to obtain B12.
The Wall Street Journal validated what I ranted about often last year. See "Sandwich" for the rant. I present to you this Mr Tumnus-like creature I saw on my lunch break walk.
On a similar note, the Washington Post reported on Walt Whitman High School in Bethesda, MD teaching mindfulness to students. How progressive! Only approval from this writer.
This mother's viewpoint I found refreshing. Her nine-year-old daughter chooses to shop in the boy's section. On a shopping trip, Ms Saar became frustrated with her daughter's preferences and urged her to look at the girls' clothing section. Her daughter had the same response I did when I was younger--all the girls' clothes are pink and purple!
Ms Saar writes,
But really, beyond the annoying fact that my daughter proved me wrong, I was angry that she couldn't find her comfort zone and sense of expression and self in the girls' section. Why is EVERYTHING for girls pink or purple? Why can't girls have the freedom to express themselves in more colors, and in more outfits that are fun and not cutesy or even sexualized?
Why is that? From an adult genderqueer individual, having the 1) economic freedom and 2) household independence/workplace tolerance to wear whatever I want (i.e., what I can afford and I work in a casual workplace to do so within reason) still doesn't mean I'm free to blur the lines. I receive second glances in the ladies' room because of my deathhawk, hoodie, and pants--not when I'm wearing a skirt. My being domestic (and wearing an apron in the kitchen) doesn't help me break out of the female mould in others' eyes.
Changing my name to a gender-neutral name has given some the impression that I am running from my biological sex. Each of these statements could be an essay in and of themselves, so I will be brief, as essays on (my) gender nonconformity are not the point of this blog. Gender nonconformity is not about "running" from one's biological sex and the connotations and social role of the gender to which one's biological sex typically correlates. Gender nonconformity is about being oneself, a self who may not fall neatly into the M or F box. I choose which aspects of my life in which I correlate biological sex with (social) gender expectation. I'm glad I have the freedom and have been relatively free of persecution for it.
As Ms Saar notes, and I've had similar conversations with my mother as well, it would be easier to go with what other people expect. Superficially, sure, but the angst and internal suffering from living a discordant life is not worth putting one's head down and conforming. That's Gothic Granola for you. Do the reflective footwork to be able to check in with yourself at anytime--meditation, journaling, confession, et cetera--and you can map, adjust, and review your self as you change.
Next week's sermon: slim-shaming! Probably with a baked good recipe!